There are only 2 possible opinions one can hold of the commissioner and of the media during the steroids era. You can either believe that (1) Bud Selig and all the beat writers in the entire country were so horrific at their jobs (I’m talking Lou Bega’s Mambo No. 5 bad) that they had absolutely no idea that the players were taking steroids or you can believe that they understood what was going on in the locker rooms and saw it as a necessary evil to get the game back on its feet at the cost of a few broken records and swollen stats.

The amusing thing here is that Bud Selig would prefer you believe option #1. When it comes down to it, he would rather be seen as a complete professional failure before he is seen as the slightest bit responsible for the steroids era. Of course, anyone in their right mind knows that this is false, the level of incompetents needed to fail so entirely at one’s job is damn near impossible.

There really is only one logical explanation. After the 1994 player’s strike forced the cancellation of the ’94 World Series, a clinically depressed and (in my head) smash-face-drunk Bud Selig shook hands with the Devil, offering up a few “minor” records in exchange for the game’s return to success. And it’s no wonder Selig had no interest in watching Bonds blast number 756 out of the park. Each swing can only remind him of that fateful day when he gave in to the big man in red, trading away the integrity of 100+ years of professional baseball for a stadium full of obnoxious half-fans wearing pink Red Sox jerseys. Sure, the money’s good, but the game just doesn’t feel quite the same.

So remember kids, like your friends at Veggie Tales tell you, be true to yourself, don’t do drugs, and never make a deal with the Devil.

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Much to the chagrin of Bud Selig, baseball purists, and sports writers all across America, Barry Bonds has now hit over 755 homeruns. Like it or not, Bonds is now the caretaker of sport’s most sacred record. The more I think about this, however, the less Barry Bonds seems like a sports hero and the more he seems like the poster-boy for the new American way. Meanwhile, watching Bud Selig’s plight and the swell of media attention feels like watching one of those God-awful, Veggie Tale cartoons where a bunch of poorly computer-animated vegetables tell me why making a deal with the Devil may be nice at first, but will always come to bite me in the tokus.

Part 1:

Barry Bonds and the Why Nice Guys Finish Last

            In 22 major league seasons, Barry Bonds has made an extremely strong case to be the greatest hitter ever to play the game.  He’s smashed records in walks, on base percentage, intentional walks, homeruns hit in a single season and, now, the most homeruns hit during a major league career.  And how did he do this?  The same way nearly every “successful” American businessman, politician, athlete, or what-have-you has done it for the past 50 years: with a combination of talent, hard work, and a “whatever it takes” attitude.

            There’s no point in arguing whether or not Barry Bonds has talent.  His numbers speak for themselves.  Even assuming that he, knowingly or unknowingly, too some kind of performance enhancing drugs, I’m pretty sure that if we pumped Barbaro’s share of steroids into someone like Brad Paisley, we wouldn’t be looking at the new homerun king.  Why not?  No talent.  And when it comes down to it, Bond’s blast to left/center field isn’t really what interests me.  Don’t get me wrong, I flipped over to ESPN for every Bonds at bat until I finally saw number 756.  But that swing wasn’t about baseball.  It wasn’t about sports, or race, or even personal greatness.  No, to me, that swing was about America’s new creed: “Whatever it takes.”

            The phrase pretty much sums up every major American scandal over the past 50 years: Enron, Watergate, Valerie Plame, Lloyd Flandis (Lance Armstrong?), Sammy Sosa, Mark McGwire, and so-on.  You can pretty much plug the words “whatever it takes” to every guilty defendant of these scandals and you would pretty much be getting the full story.  For every one guy who did it the “right” way, every one success story, there are at least a hundred different guys who have been more successful doing it the “wrong” way.  And the problem is that this new and growing mentality stands little chance of being stopped.

            Great historian, Howard Zinn, will be the first to tell you that the people of this country suffer for the simple reason that the people who make the rules are the ones that benefit from them.  But now, we’ve stepped into a world where breaking the rules is not only okay (so long as there’s no concrete evidence of it), but so wide spread that to not break the rules is to set yourself at a significant disadvantage. 

What the media has completely missed about this whole thing is that shortcuts like steroids aren’t banned to protect the individuals who want to use them.  These shortcuts have been discouraged so that they don’t become common practice.  But until the people in charge of enforcing the rules start suffering as a result of those breaking them, Barry Bonds will make $15.5 million a year, Kevin Youkilis will make $424K, and nice guys will finish last.

Written by Tarek

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Thank you so much putting the rumors to rest and admitting to your recent troubles via the below statement, but can’t you see that your hit song is no longer ironic but just plain scary?

“It was one of the most terrifying moments of my life. It was just crazy—one of the most terrifying moments of my life. I don’t know how to explain what happened. I don’t really know myself. I can’t remember what I looked like. I couldn’t recognize myself. It was terrifying—I was terrified. I was so out of control. It just happened. It shocked me. I’m sorry—I just don’t know what got into me. I never want to feel that way again. I’ve scared myself this time. I was all over the place. I know things have got to change. I have to sort myself out. I’m fine. I’ll be back at work on Monday. I’m fine, honest.”

However, despite acknowledging her overdoes and drinking/drugging problem, the songstress snuck out of rehab and checked herself into a hotel.  As far as we know most Four Seasons do not offer detox….

She claims she’ll be jumping back on her tour today and all will be well.

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The latest breaking new in the Amy Winehouse saga is the anti-rehaber has just checked herself IN to rehab.

Her label did what they had to in attempts to cover up what is being confirmed by friends and family members as a drug overdose.

She’s making her very first attempt at recover at The Priority rehab in Roehampton, South West London.

As to how this will affect her upcoming appearance on the MTV Video Music Awards as well as her scheduled US dates, we shall wait and see.

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Who do you want to believe?

Though her record label reps still stand by their statement that Amy Winehouse’s hospital stay was caused by “exhaustion”, sources and close friends are saying “oh contraire”

The other side is claiming it was a drug overdose so bad it required an adrenaline shot and stomach pump, and that she is not “resting at home” but rather at the hospital where she belongs.

Whichever the case, Vicarious music wishes Amy a speedy recovery…and of course if it was a drug overdose we want her to get the help she needs…but preferably before or after she heads out for her U.S tour…

Sorry, we’re a little selfish

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“Nearly 40 years after its original publication, Tom Wolfe’s hallucinogenic tome “The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test” is headed for the bigscreen.
Gus Van Sant is attached to direct, and Lance Black (”Big Love”) will write the script. FilmColony’s Richard Gladstein is producing, and he’s in the process of setting the project with a financier.

The book told the story of a cross-country road trip that “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” author Ken Kesey orchestrated with a group called the Merry Pranksters. Driving in a psychedelically painted bus from California to visit the World’s Fair in New York in 1964, Kesey and his band used the trip as a way to turn on those they met to the mind-expanding wonders of LSD.

Kesey ingested the drug while he wrote “Cuckoo’s Nest,” crediting the hallucinogen for many of the ideas in the book.

Shortly after the Wolfe book was published in 1967, its film rights were purchased by entrepreneur Alfred Roven. Not a film producer, Roven had some meetings over the years with filmmakers but was very protective. When he died, Roven left the rights to his children, Daryn and Alison Roven. FilmColony’s Gladstein was introduced to them by attorney Peter Grossman, and for the first time, the rights were entrusted to a producer.

Van Sant, whose latest film, “Paranoid Park,” was honored at Cannes, signed on quickly. The filmmaker cast Kesey in his 1993 film “Even Cowgirls Get the Blues” and dedicated his 2002 film “Gerry” to the author, who died in 2001. Van Sant enlisted Black, with whom he’s collaborating on a biopic of slain San Francisco pol Harvey Milk.

It’s likely Wolfe will not be a major character in the film, which will focus on Kesey and include events that occurred after the road trip.

Gladstein completed producing the Zach Helm-directed “Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium,” which Fox Walden releases this fall, as well as “The Nanny Diaries” and John Madden-directed “Killshot,” both of which the Weinstein Co. will distribute through MGM this fall.”

SOURCE

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…Just now with cocaine”.

Awhile back we reported that Keith Richards snorted his fathers ashes with cocaine, coming directly from Richards to a magazine.   Now, Richards claims this was simply a joke…

He says, “The cocaine bit was rubbish (not true). I said I chopped him up like cocaine, not with. I’d opened his box up and said, ‘Jesus, I’ve got to do something with dad, y’know, plant the oak tree.’ “I pulled the lid off and out comes a bit of dad on the dining room table. I’m going, ‘I can’t use the brush and dustpan for this’. So you just gotta like, put it together. “What I found out is that ingesting your ancestors is a very respectable way of… y’know, he went down a treat”.

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Virgin tycoon Sir Richard Branson has revealed that he has taken drugs with his son.

The extrovert billionaire says he smoked cannabis with model son Sam, now 21, during a surfing holiday in Australia.

Sir Richard, 57, “I went with my son on his gap year. We had some nights where we laughed our heads off for eight hours.”

“I don’t think smoking the occasional spliff is all that wrong. I’d rather my son did it in front of me than behind closed doors.”

In the interview with Piers Morgan for GQ magazine, the entrepreneur also admitted trying cocaine and ecstasy.

He said: “I took ecstasy once. But it didn’t have a massive effect on me”. Of cocaine, he said: “I suspect I’ve tried it, yes.”

CONTINUE READING

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It’s super expensive to booze all weekend in NYC: cabs, cover charge, the marked up alcohol itself…..and all you’re left with are shallow pockets and a wicked hangover. 

Try something different next time and get your friends together to check out the SonicVision (in collaboration with MTV2) laser light show at The America Museum of Natural History’s Hayden Planetarium.  Its culture for Gen X featuring a trippy journey through space, sea and your wildest imagination set to a hit music mix created by the masterminded Moby.

U2, Queens of the Stone Age, Coldplay, and many more help this spectacle come to life.  Check out http://www.amnh.org/rose/dome/ for upcoming viewing dates.

Cost of entry is a mere $15, one of the best deals for a night out in NYC.

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Both Ja Rule and Lil Wayne were arrested in NY on gun possession charges following Wayne’s show at the Beacon last night.

“Rappers Ja Rule and Lil Wayne were arrested on charges of carrying illegal .40 caliber guns, authorities said.

The top-selling hip-hop stars, whose latest song is named “Uh Oh”, were each arrested and charged Sunday night with criminal possession of a weapon, authorities said. Both were charged with criminal possession of a weapon and marijuana.”

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